Attention all South Dakota residents! As a temporary safety precaution, we are asking any residents who cross the time zone boundaries between Central Standard Time and Mountain Standard Time zones to hold their breath while they cross the border.
WARNING ⚠️ Failure to do this may result in the following side effects:
Visions of the past experienced as vivid hallucinations.
Sudden ability to speak Portuguese fluently.
Restless leg syndrome.
The SDDP is working with the Department of Public Safety on a solution to this problem and will keep you updated on any developments.