Department of education introduces Melee combat requirement

In order to adequately prepare the children of South Dakota for the future they face the Department of Education is introducing a melee combat requirement. To prepare students adequately for the jobs of the future like defending their crops from Raiders, raiding other nearby villages for food, and mercy killing their own sick, frail, or wounded band members the Students need a new set of skills to survive in America’s future. “Surviving in the waste land that is America’s future is going to require a new set of skills than what we’ve been teaching in a traditional classroom.” Said one board of regents member. “If we’re not teaching our kids to avoid spinal tissue and brain matter when engaging in cannibalism to survive, then we’re not being realistic about teaching them the skills they’ll need to survive within the next 10 years.”





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